it's 4.01pm

ok. i just woke up 2 hours ago..

checked my email and isetan actually emailed me to come down for an interview for the event coordinator position. oh wells, too late. i've already decided to get my degree first before anything. or was the decision so wrong?

i remembered when i was young, i made the fastest decisions especially when it comes to academics. of course one would go for the top class right? who will want to go to the bottom ones? nobody! straightforward decision. then.. when i was choosing which course to go for poly, i actually chose design related ones because i was quite into design and basically i love to do alot of hands-on stuff! i sort of enjoyed the whole 3 years except for certain really crappy modules. but it was a dead end, i just realised.

finding jobs were hard. especially when i'm someone who dislikes to do one thing only. i tot of having design work with marketing will be fun. to my horror.. there are only a few jobs for designers and most of them are much lowly paid than a sales executive. though working hours are more or less the same. passion worths this much? i think i'm just a money face. who do not work for money in singapore? every single thing is MONEY lor!

and the worse thing that can happen is that, i can't go into local uni with this dip and such results. actually, i think if i were to study something design related, maybe it's possible. but when i wanna drive over to business(cos it's all about money) and finance, it was zero chance.

i wondered... whether it was just a wrong choice or a right choice at the beginning.

i applied and got into SIM in the first place. pondering, i decided to find a job. couldn't get a nice one that i really like.. or the reply email was just not in time... i decided to go for psb academy which offers the same degree in SIM. just that it's much much nearer to my home and there's not a need to pay for shitty entrance fee! BUT, i just realised that it's the first year that the school's offering this full time. guinea pig lar. nvm. i'll just have to pia like shit.

in life, we have choices. but choices have consequences. sometimes, i don't really think that we've choices to start with in the first place. it's deep down.

i tot of a topic for my next blog's post - gossip.

haha! i think it's what i do with my friends most of the time. =)

next. oh boy, i quarreled with my boy AGAIN. this time round, i'm just so pissed off with him that i actually didn't want to talk to him for many many days. cos his attitude just sucks. sucks as in - he can give all sort of excuses, dumps me away when i'm pissed off because of him, show me lots of attitude even if he's in the wrong! he uses phrases like "mind you!", asking me questions like "how do you feel when someone just dun answer your calls?". i just felt so irritated because he's in the wrong and for god sake, he can even give me this kinda sucky attitude and say "just move on" and "forget about it". and if YOU are reading this, i'm SO SORRY that i CANNOT move on because I HAVE NOT FORGIVEN YOU because YOUR ATTITUDE JUST SUCKS BIG TIME! you think this is such a small matter, but it's not. because i can't accept a boyfriend that just shoves off and think he could get away so easily. put it simply, your apology came in too late and you just dun give a damn about me. that's all. your sms-es and calls just came in too late. i've given you chances and chances. DAYS in fact and you didn't even bother. if you can just live without me for the fucking few days, so be it! you've always waited for me to stick on to you. and i'm telling you this now, i'm so so tired of doing this! calling you and you dun even bother to call me! you love to sleep, watch your tv, play your soccer game and you dun even bother to call back after doing finish your stuff! you love to have time for yourself, you'll have it all to yourself from now on then. and no, i'm not treating you like an idiot. cos i could not even be bothered to entertain some horrible egoistic person.